Where Genres Collide Traci Dowe YA Author

The Beauty of Accepting Ourselves and Others as We Age Within the Pages of Life

Traci Kenworth

Wherever we begin in life, whatever our journey, the beauty of accepting ourselves and others as we age within the pages of life comes after a lifetime. When we’re a bright star burning along that path in the beginning, we don’t consider the whole of it. That is, we don’t think about what we’ve learned, what we’re still learning. We just keep going. Faster and faster. Always the need to keep moving.

But as we relax along that pathway, as we learn to turn the tide, we begin to slow and think about our movements. Where we’ve been, where we’re going. No longer do we thrash about in any direction. We choose one with purpose. Now, we study our whereabouts and begin to plan. That’s how life works. Learning bit by bit as we go. We stumble at first then we eventually learn to hit our stride.

It may take a while, but it’ll happen. When we’re in school, we begin to draw into cliques, into groups of those more like us. Or perhaps, those who can fake it as well as another. We’re all just trying to get by, just trying to find that rug to pull us up to the next level. We do what we can to get into a good college and hope and pray it was the right choice. That we picked the right major.

Nowadays, well at any time, it’s uncertain. Jobs change as fast as light bulbs. One moment we’re one place then another. We’re always searching for security but somehow that never comes. It’s lost alongside anything these days: relationships, dreams, and mortality. We never see a lot of it coming. We just wing it. Sometimes life’s like that bartender you see in the movies, the one who’s always willing to lend an ear.

Except, you don’t quite find those irl. In real life, you rely on a close friend, a good neighbor, or a family member. In years past, it might’ve been a clergy person. Although some of us might still attend church, we don’t often confide in another there for fear of reproachment. I’ve had a pastor wife condemn me after finding out that I write horror. It turned me off the whole church experience.

Not that I don’t believe in God or Jesus if you’ve read any of my other posts. I just remember that he said that his church is not confined by a building but by the people within. So, maybe that’s what we should do: take a look around at the people around us. Consider who’s trustworthy. Although, hopefully, they wouldn’t be in your life if they weren’t.

Accepting those around us may take a bit of time. Just the same as it does for accepting the flaws about ourselves that linger despite our best efforts. It takes work. I do think it’s easier to accept weakness in others rather than in ourselves however. Maybe because it doesn’t take us as much work. Instead, we either agree or don’t with the other’s changes.

It may be hard to get past the hurts they’ve caused. And I’m not suggesting if they’ve done something reprehensible to stick around. No, I’m talking about smaller things. Arguments. Disagreements on politics, religion, whatever. Things that can be talked through. Or, at the very least, set aside. Sometimes, it’s not possible to discuss these with individuals. You have to decide whether to just move on to dropping that piece from your get-togethers.

You might not like the subject but you’ve got to let go of the block if you want a relationship with that individual. Because, at some point, you need to realize you’re not going to change their mind. They are going to be who they’re going to be. Just like you. It’s here where you decide whether to support each other no matter what.

The beauty of accepting others as we age within the pages of life is up to us, win or fail. No matter what happens, we must agree to that. Each of us is allowed our own mind, our own thoughts, our own rules. Come what may. We take what comes and move on with our lives, knowing we’re at peace with our decisions.

Happenings: It’s been a while. Sorry about that. A lot has happened. For instance, the stress tests showed there was no evidence of congestive heart failure. I did have fluid on the heart and legs though. And although they said my tests were “perfect,” there was still a concern. My heartbeat was really, really fast. They put me on a beta blocker in addition to the water pills and Jardiance. Also, during all these tests, they mentioned that the tests showed I’d had a heart attack previously. I believe that all went back to the end of Jan. when I was in bed for days. I had flu-like symptoms but I knew there was something more going on with my body, it just didn’t feel right, and that is a sign of a silent heart attack. I also think it all came about because of a decongestant someone I knew recommended I take because I was having trouble with my sinuses at the time. Turns out, decongestants can spike your heartbeat, my heart doctor said. He also said there was no sign of damage to my heart which is good news. From the end of Jan. on, my head had been so confused and foggy and I found myself dazing off quite a bit, unable to hold a conversation, this is what caused me to seek medical help in the first place. Turns out this was a side effect of the decongestant as well. It was so bad it had roughened up my lungs and brought on the cough which made them think I had water on my lungs. Once that was out of my system, I felt like myself more and more. It’s been different getting used to the new meds and no-salt routine but I’m getting better and better. So, yeah, another loop in what I thought was going on and had been told was going on, now straightened out.

Some things around the web to check out:

1. Writers Helping Writers https://writershelpingwriters.net/2023/03/fear-thesaurus-entry-conditional-love/ Debilitating fears are a problem for everyone, an unfortunate part of the human experience. Whether they’re a result of learned behavior as a child, are related to a mental health condition, or stem from a past wounding event, these fears influence a character’s behaviors, habits, beliefs, and personality traits. The compulsion to avoid what they fear will drive characters away from certain people, events, and situations and hold them back in life. In your story, this primary fear (or group of fears) will constantly challenge the goal the character is pursuing, tempting them to retreat, settle, and give up on what they want most. Because this fear must be addressed for them to achieve success, balance, and fulfillment, it plays a pivotal part in both the character arc and the overall story. This thesaurus explores the various fears that might be plaguing your character. Use it to understand and utilize fears to fully develop your characters and steer them through their story arc. Please note that this isn’t a self-diagnosis tool. Fears are common in the real world, and while we may at times share similar tendencies as characters, the entry below is for fiction writing purposes only. Fear of Being Loved Conditionally Notes Conditional love has to be earned through performance or achievements. A character who has experienced love in this way is likely to develop certain habits that they believe will ensure the acceptance of others. They may also perceive their value as being tied to certain behaviors or successes. These thought patterns and actions may continue to plague the character even after they’ve recognized that this kind of love is unhealthy and they want no part of it.
2. Smorgasbord Magazine https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/2023/03/11/smorgasbord-book-promotions-book-review-ya-dystopian-the-insurgent-the-colony-series-book-2-by-teri-polen/ If a megalomaniac threatened your family, would you give up your freedom for them? Would you give up your soul? Asher Solomon is faced with that choice. And makes the ultimate sacrifice. Exactly as Director Silas Reeves expected him to. Unable to live as the Colony’s premier assassin, Ash retreats to a corner of his mind, ceding control of his body to the alter-ego he was engineered to be—Subject A36. As he’s unleashed to battle the Insurgents, the only family he ever knew, the tide of war shifts in Silas’s favor. Combined with his expansion into new territories, the director is poised to take over the world. But the Insurgents don’t give up easily. Not on their cause, and not on their people. With the help of a few double agents deep in the Colony, they stand a fighting chance at ending Silas’s reign. In order to shut down the program, they face almost insurmountable odds. And their most dangerous foe—their former champion turned killing machine, A36. Still have to get around to reading these! Sounds terrifying!
3. Entertaining Stories https://coldhandboyack.wordpress.com/2023/03/11/still-fumbling/ I decided to work on Percy the Space Chimp today. Getting both of these stories flowing has taken me more time than I anticipated. Honestly, since Percy involves a sequel, I thought it would be up and running a little faster. I feel the need to at least do some minor reintroductions of the characters because there could be someone out there who reads them months apart. Prejudice is one thing that kind of sets Percy off, so that’s where I went. It allowed me to revisit his relationship with Buffer Dole, and the clones got some page time, too. They managed to obtain their course from the spy network and avoided throttling the crap out of some people. All I have to do is get them to their ship and send them into the unclaimed part of the galaxy.
4. Chris the Story Reading Ape https://thestoryreadingapeblog.com/2023/03/11/how-to-slay-others-with-your-writing-guest-post-by-traci-kenworth/ How to slay others with your writing comes with practice and confidence in yourself and in your writing. When you’re younger, you stumble down the road not sure where to go, or what to see in life. That’s why experienced writers have always recommended to those coming after them, for the others to take their time, and watch the swans in the pond. Dream. Dreaming helps whet that appetite. What appetite you ask? Why the one for making writing more than just a pit stop. The more you do something, the more you learn. That’s a truth universal. We don’t want to believe it’s that easy. We insist there must be some secret that the big writers are keeping from us. Some magic they found along the way. And there is: it’s called butt-in-the-chair. You keep at it. Even when it’s tough. No matter how much you feel like giving up. You don’t. You go on. You keep on. Even when it’s hard. Despite wanting to throw away the manuscript, you fight the urge. And gently tuck it away. Wait. Pull it forth. Begin again after you’ve given it some distance. The distance helps. It helps you take stock of things you couldn’t when you were too close to things. That’s how you get through. Make progress. One step at a time. Sort of like life. You learn new techniques as you go about the process. Marketing. Interviews. Small time at this point, of course, but hey, they lead to notice and notice is what you want and someday those small times will come in handy. Blogging is a good thing to have a go at. Couldn’t resist!
5. Nail Your Novel https://nailyournovel.wordpress.com/2023/03/10/your-first-pages-5-manuscripts-critiqued-at-litopia-by-literary-agent-agentpete-aj_dickenson-and-me/
6. Syl’s 65 blog https://syl65.wordpress.com/2023/03/12/3-12-23/ He has such beautiful, soulful poetry!
7. Myths of the Mirror https://mythsofthemirror.com/2023/03/11/the-zone-2/ I don’t know about you, but for me, the creative process requires a lengthy visit to “The Zone.” If you’re an artist of any kind, you probably know what I’m talking about, surely sense the obsessive urge, the quiver of excitement at the prospect of exploring undiscovered shores. My creative muse resides there, tantalizing and intoxicating, and she demands my undivided attention. I love each foray into the Zone—despite its consumption of my life. It’s creative gluttony, stuffing my face with words, gobbling down characters, disgorging pathos. When I dive into the Zone, I’m not myself. I’m immersed in my craft, drowning in a taste of pure manna like an addict. The rest of the world fades into the hazy horizon as the Zone awakens that right brain craving. As a writer, this is especially true during my first draft when a story takes shape. Within the Zone, unfamiliar scenes tap from my fingertips and uncooperative characters demand a voice. A fickle wind pushes my plot, requiring vigilance to stay on course. As an adventurer, I’m on my own, trying to make sense of an untold tale before I return to my ordinary life, take a long overdue shower…wash loads of stinky laundry…vacuum blankets of dog hair…make dinner for a gaunt spouse surviving on snack food. Oh, I SO LOVE the zone! It is candy for writers! A place where literally anything can happen and does in creation and the writer is frantic to get said down.
8. Angel Messages https://annetterochelleaben.wordpress.com/2023/03/12/angel-messages-mar-12-2023/
9. Stream of Consciousness https://johnwhowell.com/2023/03/11/stream-of-consciousness-saturday-prompt-mat-met-mitt-mot-mutt/ My cup runneth over mainly because an accidental hit of the brew button brought three instead of two 5 oz servings. Luckily the machine has a drain, or the tsunami of caffeine would be on the floor. So the absorbent mat that is in reserve will not be necessary. Sipping the life fluid reminds me of last week’s arrival of too many Warner Brothers look-alikes for comfort. The grey rabbit said there was going to be a circus. An inquiry to the city assured me that no permit was necessary if it was held on my property, and no entrance fees were charged. We met in person so that the possibility of talking them into a restraining order could have happened. The mutt of a compliance officer refused to prevent what will no doubt become mayhem. In deep thought, the thirty-story falling piano crash of the doorbell jerked me back to reality. It also set off a round of barking, cracking every mirror in the house. A toss of my old baseball mitt causes Lucy and Twiggy to think a sheep is loose in the place and brings the silence of chasing the lambs. “Who is there,” is the inquiry through the Ring doorbell.” “C’est Moi. Phiil Harris.” As I told John, I really enjoy these Looney Tunes scenarios.
10. Chris the Story Reading Ape https://thestoryreadingapeblog.com/2023/03/12/writing-female-characters-in-fantasy-guest-post-by-jaq-d-hawkins/ It has become cliché that male writers are notoriously bad at writing female characters, especially in the Fantasy genre, but are female writers any better? This question came to mind because I often find female characters in novels written by women writers this century as either totally airheads or unrealistically badass. Two of my own free-spirited female characters (in different books) have taken some review criticism for behaving, quite honestly, more realistically. One was a goblin character, Talla, who comes from a culture where there is a shortage of females and a need to breed more younglings. It seemed only natural to me that in such a circumstance, the female goblins would be given sexual choice and would be free of the restrictions that human religions impose on women and girls. These are people who live close to nature. Observe any species in the wild and the goblin society reflects similar characteristics, including a certain freeform breeding culture. As suggested, culture as well as weather matter. Someone in a snowfilled environment would wear layers. Unless, of course, they had some type of jewelry or armor that melted the snow.
11. Writers in the Storm https://writersinthestormblog.com/2023/03/5-reasons-your-amazon-ads-arent-drawing-in-readers/ With new books of every genre being added to Amazon daily, it’s crucial that you understand what makes for good book promotion on the platform and what you can be doing better. A lot of authors begin an Amazon ad campaign without learning trends, updates, and all that goes into a well-performing campaign. Through the thousands of ad campaigns I’ve managed, I’ve learned quite a bit about this specific marketing art form. And I’ve pulled the top reasons that authors’ ads fail to draw in more readers or end up costing more than they’re worth. You Don’t Have Enough Keywords In order to gain traction, you need to start with a high number of keywords. Just five keywords aren’t going to cut it. My recommendation is 300 – 400 keywords, and if that number made you gasp, then consider this: I don’t need you to find 400 unique keywords. I need you to find 100 – 150 and save them as different match types. So, you’ll be saving them as broad, exact, and phrase matches, which will allow you to watch and see how the same keyword does under these different match types. You’re Using the Wrong Keywords or Keyword Blends Whenever I pull together keywords for an author’s ad campaign, I do so with keywords I find right on the Amazon site. I don’t use software or shortcuts. Finding keywords that are already trending on Amazon is a great way to dip into consumer trends, too, which is something that software often doesn’t capture. The other issue is the blend of keywords versus book titles and author names. If I’m working with a fiction book, I’m doing 80% book titles and author names and 20% of keywords. If I’m working on an ad set for non-fiction books, the numbers are reversed. So, I do 80% keywords and 20% book titles and authors. My reasoning is that a consumer searching for a non-fiction book is searching for a specific topic or benefits of a topic. A reader looking for their next great fiction read is looking at genre (and this is where your product placement ads can really do well), but they’re also looking for authors similar to ones they’ve already read work from.
12. Story Empire blog https://storyempire.com/2023/03/10/celebrate-the-day-of-awesomeness/ Hi SEers. John with you on this TGIF Fri-Yay. This is the second time in a row I had planned to do more on humor but found something a little better. Do you know what day this is? This is the Day of Awesomeness. That’s right, March 10 is a day to recognize and celebrate awesomeness wherever you find it. For those of us who still work at home, awesomeness might be found on that beautiful couch that calls our name at about two o’clock. Or maybe it’s that special cup of coffee that can only come from the most awesome beans and machine. It could even be super quiet that descends upon your workplace after all those annoying co-habitues depart for the day. For those of us who work at an employer’s location, awesomeness may be found in catching the elevator and finding it empty. Or maybe the last person actually made a new pot of coffee, and it is fresh and hot and waiting for you. How about the boss approving your request for one work-at-home day a week and will leave the choice of the day up to you? Those of us who don’t work awesomeness might be found enjoying an extra cup of coffee while finishing a blueberry scone. Maybe it’s going to the store and being the first person in the checkout line. Could also be going to the library and finding that number one best seller is available to check out. For we writer’s awesomeness can be found in a finely turned sentence. Or maybe in that plot twist just created. Or how about seeing your latest book for sale on Amazon.
13. Rosie Amber https://rosieamber.wordpress.com/2023/03/10/%f0%9f%93%9aa-time-travel-fantasy-adventure-with-a-strong-fairy-tale-theme-rosies-bookreview-of-grimm-diagnosis-matt-golec-booktwitter/
14. Meeka’s Mind https://acflory.wordpress.com/2023/03/09/backup-backup-backup/ I confess, I’ve been very, very lucky. I haven’t been doing my backups as often as I should, but last night I backed up ALL my most important works-in-progress. Lady Luck must have been looking out for me because when I booted up my pc this morning, the hard drive on which I usually save all my data was…’ inaccessible’. When I looked at the map of my hard drives [I have two], my data drive didn’t even have the NTFS operating system structure. I had to format the drive in order to be able to use it again. Needless to say, I won’t be using it for anything critical from here on in. Once I can afford to have another one installed, it’ll be gone. I have lost some data, including the most recent pics used in my blog, and a heap of raw footage from videos I’ve worked on, but at least all of that stuff was completed. The pics were uploaded to WordPress and the finished videos were uploaded to Youtube so I haven’t lost anything critical. That’s why I say I’ve been so lucky; if this had happened a few days earlier, I would have lost a week’s worth of video-in-progress. And if I hadn’t backed up last night… -shudder- In case you’re wondering, I backup periodically to an external harddrive that can take masses of data. In between times, I backup work-in-progress data to a thumb drive that sits on my desk all the time and is quick and easy to use. Unfortunately, I don’t back up data often enough.